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in the office where i work, there are several persons who are universally, or close to it anyway, despised. to use english (as opposed to hokkien), they are labelled skivers. though treated with civility by the general populace, behind their backs they are slammed and generally made fun of, in bitter and somewhat resentful tones.


i had come to realise after awhile that joining in with the discontent rumblings constituted something akin to gossip, i.e. saying bad things about people who aren't present, and so i sought to understand the foundations of this ill-will and negative feeling about these particular people. you know of such people. answer this question with the first person that comes to mind: who do you hate?


it took me quite awhile to understand the dynamics at work. at a cursory glance, these people are conscientious enough, doing what work is assigned to them with vigour and verve. They complete the tasks which are appointed to them, and somehow still manage to leave the office on time everyday. i toyed with the idea that these people might simply be efficient.

then i realised what distinguished these people from others, from my personal experience. these guys were the ones who would come to me and ask me to help them complete tasks. simple menial tasks, such as faxing documents, photocopying, pasting, stapling etc. time-consuming, but menial tasks. they make these requests under the guise of friendship, YET WHEN YOU REQUEST THE SAME OF THEM.... they'll be busy. they'll be doing their own work. things to do, people to see, whatever it is, a thousand apologies but they CAN'T possibly help you at this particular moment, maybe tomorrow or next year or next millenium.

i realised eventually that there was a more fundamental problem there... its kind of like selfishness, in a sense. these people have a very clearly defined scope of what is THEIR work, and what is SOMEONE ELSE'S work. and they have absolutely no incentive to do anyone else's work. their own work will always take priority, and when they ARE free, they'll ask you to get someone else to do it cos the other guy does it better/has too few responsibilities anyway.

i realise i react best to the people who immediately try to help me/understand my problem better. it doesn't take a genius to understand that, everyone loves a helpful person. i don't expect that reaction all the time, of course, since people have their own work to attend to, but if i get a helpful response occasionally it's enough to convince me that they're good people in general.

these buggers who annoy me... never lift a finger to help me when i ask. or do so only when it suits their own purposes. they finish their work, and make themselves scarce. if i only did the work that my job scope entails, i'd have half the amount of work to do.

it is a struggle for me to love this person. i spent all of lunchtime silently telling him off in my head, blowing off a head of steam. but i recall one pearl of wisdom that got lodged in my clamshell head some time ago...

you can't blame people for the way they are. if you do, you'll begin to hate. remember that all the bad in each person is a manifestation of that deception Satan introduced on earth all those thousands of years ago.

who can take credit for his own character? the unique ways in which each of us act is a product of a potpourri of factors. so the guy acts like a complete asshole. perhaps his parents didnt bring him up too well, or there were family problems, or he fell into bad company. either which way, he is a person to be pitied simply because HE DOESN'T KNOW ANY BETTER. He doesn't know what it means to be loved, and to love people whole-heartedly. He doesn't have a focus in his life, or it might just be a lousy focus that will end up as nothing. being a complete asshole is in itself pitiable - he'll have no true friends, he has no joy in life, life is futile, meaningless, a chasing after the wind.

We, as Christians, we have a choice. To love mercy, to do justly, and to walk humbly before our God. What more does the Lord require of us?


i cannot, and i struggle to remember this, i cannot take credit for all that people admire me for. i had good parents, maybe not great, but they taught me what was important. i had natural ability, but that comes from God, and i had no part to play there. good teachers, a church to grow up in, i have had more than most. even things like self-discipline and determination - you cannot take credit for them, they are determined by nature and nurture.

so what reason have we to boast? Praise be to God, from whom all blessings flow, from whom all good things come down to us.