Oct 12, 2008
Oct 7, 2008
geeky and proud of it
this thought came to me when i was thinking about the kind of stuff people write on their t-shirts.
i saw a girl wearing a shirt saying something like, "I wanted it, I threw a tantrum, I got it." and in my head i was going "poor girl, you've never known anyone with the courage to stand up to you and discipline you."
i started thinking about the kind of shirts i like... they usually involve horrendously bad puns, or in-jokes which not everyone will understand. example of the former: "Christians have the best sects" example of the latter: "There are only 10 kinds of people in the world; those who understand binary, and those who don't."
i suppose it's part of geek culture to be proud of the fact that you have accrued ostentatious amounts of obscure information, and also to show off your vocabulary every now and then. :D
i am beginning to understand that this is a bad thing. i do like to show off what i know at the expense of loving others. praying for change.
i mean, seriously! i even read webcomics! how geeky is that?
i saw a girl wearing a shirt saying something like, "I wanted it, I threw a tantrum, I got it." and in my head i was going "poor girl, you've never known anyone with the courage to stand up to you and discipline you."
i started thinking about the kind of shirts i like... they usually involve horrendously bad puns, or in-jokes which not everyone will understand. example of the former: "Christians have the best sects" example of the latter: "There are only 10 kinds of people in the world; those who understand binary, and those who don't."
i suppose it's part of geek culture to be proud of the fact that you have accrued ostentatious amounts of obscure information, and also to show off your vocabulary every now and then. :D
i am beginning to understand that this is a bad thing. i do like to show off what i know at the expense of loving others. praying for change.
i mean, seriously! i even read webcomics! how geeky is that?
Oct 4, 2008
i live dangerously...
twice this week i have left my entire set of keys hanging outside my hostel room door. once, this was overnight - approximately 9 hours.
i thank God that i still have my keys.
i thank God that i still have my keys.
Sep 29, 2008
hooray for double standards *sarcasm*
so i was attempting to find library space to work on a presentation with a friend today. it is well-nigh impossible to get library space (with table, and power-point) anytime after 10am, and i was there at 4pm.
so i backed up into one of those "for cell-phone users only" rooms - i figured that since i needed to discuss the presentation, it was as good an alibi as any.
but nope, a librarian comes along after about 5 minutes and politely asks us to move. i argue abit, but he refuses to give in. so i move.
and then i notice that he hasn't bothered even approaching the other people in all the other cell-phone rooms to ask them to move. he just walked off!
irksome.
and my latest VIVA was horrible. and i've just found an online comic strip that i like, and i've gone through about 600 back strips. only halfway through the archives, but that's still alot for a day when i was supposed to be working.
*edit: reached 1200 before sleeping. whoops*
so i backed up into one of those "for cell-phone users only" rooms - i figured that since i needed to discuss the presentation, it was as good an alibi as any.
but nope, a librarian comes along after about 5 minutes and politely asks us to move. i argue abit, but he refuses to give in. so i move.
and then i notice that he hasn't bothered even approaching the other people in all the other cell-phone rooms to ask them to move. he just walked off!
irksome.
and my latest VIVA was horrible. and i've just found an online comic strip that i like, and i've gone through about 600 back strips. only halfway through the archives, but that's still alot for a day when i was supposed to be working.
*edit: reached 1200 before sleeping. whoops*
Sep 25, 2008
Zion for whom...
Jer 32:17b
"...Zion for whom no one cares."
when the words you want to say get choked up in your throat.
i discovered a wound today.
if there's one thing i've been learning of late, it is this: the heart is central.
*weeps*
"...Zion for whom no one cares."
when the words you want to say get choked up in your throat.
i discovered a wound today.
if there's one thing i've been learning of late, it is this: the heart is central.
*weeps*
Sep 20, 2008
midnight adventure
in cell yesterday we were talking abit about how it was important to rid ourselves of the lies that have been placed in our hearts from our past. i guess it was in this context that i had abit of an adventure...
i sprained my knee mildly while playing soccer with the guys - the usual knee gave way again, but it wasn't a bad sprain, because i could walk without too much difficulty after a short rest. but since more soccer was obviously not an option, i decided to head back to hostel. it was then about 11:15pm - i figured i might just about catch the last 151 from clementi area into school. although i missed a 74 just as i arrived at the bus-stop, another one arrived within about 3 minutes.
i was looking anxiously out the back of the bus to see if any 151 was overhauling my bus - if there was, i would need to take emergency action. but i didn't see any other bus my whole journey to clementi, and as i got off at the last bus stop on clementi road, my watch read 11:48pm.
I took a moment to glance at the information board - Service 151, weekdays, last bus at 11:48pm. "Hmm", I thought, "the last bus is usually abit slow. Guess I made it in time." Just about then I received an sms. And by Murphy's law, while I was checking it, 151 zoomed by.
So I thought, "Sigh. Why does this always happen to me." Having missed my last bus, I figured there wasn't much point hanging around, so i started walking towards school. About 3 minutes later, another 151 went past me while I was crossing a traffic light. Sigh... Brilliant decision-making there. Had i just stopped to think for a moment, I would have caught that bus.
So I started asking God why. It's too coincidental not to be pre-arranged. I'm trying o hard to catch the last bus after blowing $7 on a 3-min cab ride last week, I make it there with 30 seconds to spare, my friend smses me at exactly the right moment, I end up walking with a sore knee, and the last bus mysteriously becomes the 2nd last bus. So in the context of what I was talking about earlier, I started identifying the belief statements that I had been spouting. 1) Bad stuff always happens to me. 2) My decision-making is poor.
Both statements are unbiblical. The second one especially hinders me in many things. Fear of making the wrong decision has often crippled me. So awareness is good.
yup, plenty more drama after that. Reached my room at 12:30am. 40 mins of talking to God is nice.
i sprained my knee mildly while playing soccer with the guys - the usual knee gave way again, but it wasn't a bad sprain, because i could walk without too much difficulty after a short rest. but since more soccer was obviously not an option, i decided to head back to hostel. it was then about 11:15pm - i figured i might just about catch the last 151 from clementi area into school. although i missed a 74 just as i arrived at the bus-stop, another one arrived within about 3 minutes.
i was looking anxiously out the back of the bus to see if any 151 was overhauling my bus - if there was, i would need to take emergency action. but i didn't see any other bus my whole journey to clementi, and as i got off at the last bus stop on clementi road, my watch read 11:48pm.
I took a moment to glance at the information board - Service 151, weekdays, last bus at 11:48pm. "Hmm", I thought, "the last bus is usually abit slow. Guess I made it in time." Just about then I received an sms. And by Murphy's law, while I was checking it, 151 zoomed by.
So I thought, "Sigh. Why does this always happen to me." Having missed my last bus, I figured there wasn't much point hanging around, so i started walking towards school. About 3 minutes later, another 151 went past me while I was crossing a traffic light. Sigh... Brilliant decision-making there. Had i just stopped to think for a moment, I would have caught that bus.
So I started asking God why. It's too coincidental not to be pre-arranged. I'm trying o hard to catch the last bus after blowing $7 on a 3-min cab ride last week, I make it there with 30 seconds to spare, my friend smses me at exactly the right moment, I end up walking with a sore knee, and the last bus mysteriously becomes the 2nd last bus. So in the context of what I was talking about earlier, I started identifying the belief statements that I had been spouting. 1) Bad stuff always happens to me. 2) My decision-making is poor.
Both statements are unbiblical. The second one especially hinders me in many things. Fear of making the wrong decision has often crippled me. So awareness is good.
yup, plenty more drama after that. Reached my room at 12:30am. 40 mins of talking to God is nice.
Sep 18, 2008
Aug 31, 2008
gratitude
was emo-ing badly today during service. i suppose i was just grouchy. was demanding of God what i could expect from Him, what promises i could claim, or whether the whole Christian life was service and suffering...
the scriptures seem to back me up here. Jesus told his disciples this: that if they had a servant who had spent the whole day working in the fields, and came back in the evening, would they not tell the servant to prepare dinner and serve them first before eating his own dinner? and would they thank the servant for doing what he had been told to do? so must we be, having done all that has been asked of us, say only that we are unworthy servants... in another passage, Jesus tells his disciples that anyone who puts his hand to the plow and turns to look back is not fit for the kingdom of God...
was flipping through the gospels during service... sermon was about parenting, so not immediately applicable to me. i stumbled upon a familiar passage, talking about the kingdom of God... it says that the kingdom of God is like a man who discovered a treasure in a field, who then went and sold everything he had and bought the field. and so i was reminded that all our life and all our service has already been bought and paid for, and that it was God who gave us the great gift of salvation first, such that we now give Him our whole life in gratitude.
It reminded me of a song:
It's the great gift of Your salvation
Working in me, working in me
It's the life giving taste of heaven
Your kindness revealed, your kindness revealed to me
I went for a seminar thing yesterday, dozed through bits of it. But one bit which I do remember was when the speaker reminded us that the only acceptable motivation for obeying God is our gratitude. Never should we think that we are somehow doing God a favour, or gaining brownie points with God. Nor should we even work merely out of a sense of duty, lest we should make an idol out of our sense of duty.
I've always insisted that everything I do must have a reason. But it seems to me now that this is another form of pride.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waYUzxK8TYA
the scriptures seem to back me up here. Jesus told his disciples this: that if they had a servant who had spent the whole day working in the fields, and came back in the evening, would they not tell the servant to prepare dinner and serve them first before eating his own dinner? and would they thank the servant for doing what he had been told to do? so must we be, having done all that has been asked of us, say only that we are unworthy servants... in another passage, Jesus tells his disciples that anyone who puts his hand to the plow and turns to look back is not fit for the kingdom of God...
was flipping through the gospels during service... sermon was about parenting, so not immediately applicable to me. i stumbled upon a familiar passage, talking about the kingdom of God... it says that the kingdom of God is like a man who discovered a treasure in a field, who then went and sold everything he had and bought the field. and so i was reminded that all our life and all our service has already been bought and paid for, and that it was God who gave us the great gift of salvation first, such that we now give Him our whole life in gratitude.
It reminded me of a song:
It's the great gift of Your salvation
Working in me, working in me
It's the life giving taste of heaven
Your kindness revealed, your kindness revealed to me
I went for a seminar thing yesterday, dozed through bits of it. But one bit which I do remember was when the speaker reminded us that the only acceptable motivation for obeying God is our gratitude. Never should we think that we are somehow doing God a favour, or gaining brownie points with God. Nor should we even work merely out of a sense of duty, lest we should make an idol out of our sense of duty.
I've always insisted that everything I do must have a reason. But it seems to me now that this is another form of pride.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waYUzxK8TYA
Aug 30, 2008
a hypothetical question
one of the questions i've posed to certain wise people i know is this: why should people get married?
the only answer that seems true is because they want to. so that they can enjoy the greater intimacy that can only come from marriage and actually living together and committing to each other for this lifetime. but something about this answer gave me disquiet.
i guess that i have this mindset where wanting to do something isn't a good enough reason to go and do it. and as i think about it more, i guess this is a reaction from my past, where every thing that i wanted was something that was bad for me, and the bible verse which made the most sense to me was Jer 17:9, "The heart is deceitful above all things."
it also doesn't really jive with the idea that my life is no longer my own, and that everything i do is in service of a higher calling. and yet, as the seminar i went to today touched on, service is the wrong concept.
it's abit of a paradigm shift to think that some of the things i want are actually good things, and that i should just go ahead and strive for them. and i guess marriage falls into this category.
the only answer that seems true is because they want to. so that they can enjoy the greater intimacy that can only come from marriage and actually living together and committing to each other for this lifetime. but something about this answer gave me disquiet.
i guess that i have this mindset where wanting to do something isn't a good enough reason to go and do it. and as i think about it more, i guess this is a reaction from my past, where every thing that i wanted was something that was bad for me, and the bible verse which made the most sense to me was Jer 17:9, "The heart is deceitful above all things."
it also doesn't really jive with the idea that my life is no longer my own, and that everything i do is in service of a higher calling. and yet, as the seminar i went to today touched on, service is the wrong concept.
it's abit of a paradigm shift to think that some of the things i want are actually good things, and that i should just go ahead and strive for them. and i guess marriage falls into this category.
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